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Do Your Financial Splurges Embarrass You?

January 16, 2020 By MelissaB Leave a Comment

Do your financial splurges embarrass you?  If they do, you may have noticed that some indulgences are more socially acceptable than others.  Many people don’t see anything negative about someone buying a lot of clothes on clearance even though her closet is already full and she doesn’t need anything.  Get a steal on clothes that you don’t even need, and you’ll likely be praised.  In fact, others may try to emulate your deal seeking prowess.  Yet, spend your money on something that benefits you but society sees as extravagant, and you may be shamed.

Do Your Financial Splurges Embarrass You?

Bargain Shoppers or Money Wasters?

I have a relative who is very good at frugal grocery shopping.  However, she is a little too good at it.  She buys more “deals” than she needs, so much so that she had her husband build shelves in their basement for her to store the deals that don’t fit in their pantry and kitchen.  Because she goes shopping for groceries every week, continually finds deals, and only has three members in her family, she’ll never get through all of the food deals she has bought before they expire.  Yet, friends always are impressed by her grocery shopping skills.

Do Your Financial Splurges Embarrass You?
Photo by chuttersnap on Unsplash

In our society, we see spending as little as possible per item as admirable even if we’re spending a lot over time for things we don’t need. In fact, in my relative’s case, these items may never be used and just tossed at a later date.

Splurges That Fit Your Life and Budget

However, if you hire a housekeeper because you have a busy schedule and a messy house stresses you out, people may judge you and argue that you’re spending your money frivolously.  Yet, isn’t it just as frivolous to buy clothes and groceries that you don’t need?

The bottom line is that we all get to choose what to do with our money.  If you’re financially responsible, you can choose to spend your money in ways that others may find frivolous.

Perhaps you hire a house cleaning service.  Maybe you buy that sports car you’ve wanted since you were a teenager.  Maybe you take the trip to Europe that you’ve always dreamed of.

 

 

 

 

 

Don’t feel the need to conform to society’s expectations and judgments. 

If you and your spouse work full-time outside the home, and you’d benefit from more hours on the weekends spending time with your kids rather than cleaning the house, go ahead, spend your discretionary money on hiring a house cleaner.

If you feel that a traveling sports team will give your child an advantage when it comes to high school and college as well as personally and physically, go ahead and pay for the team and the travel if you need to travel with your child.

Do Your Financial Splurges Embarrass You?
Photo by Ben Hershey on Unsplash

The bottom line is that you make the best decisions for you and your family.  Maybe you have a minimalist wardrobe and cook at home every night so you can afford to splurge in other areas of your life.  That’s okay.

You can spend your extra money any way you see fit.  Society has a rigid standard of what compromises smart use of your money.  However, only you and your spouse can determine what compromises smart use of your own money considering your lifestyle and finances.

What is one splurge that you have that you feel society frowns upon?  How did you overcome societal judgement?

MelissaB
MelissaB

Melissa is a writer and virtual assistant. She earned her Master’s from Southern Illinois University, and her Bachelor’s in English from the University of Michigan. When she’s not working, you can find her homeschooling her kids, reading a good book, or cooking. She resides in New York, where she loves the natural beauty of the area.

www.momsplans.com/

Filed Under: budget, Married Money

Is Debt Hiding a Form of Cheating?

January 13, 2020 By MelissaB Leave a Comment

When you think of infidelity, you likely think of one person sneaking out late at night or during the workday to have a romantic tryst with someone other than her spouse.  But sexual infidelity is just one form of infidelity.  Another type that is becoming increasingly common in our society is secretly spending money and going into debt without your spouse’s knowledge or consent.  Yet, is hiding your spendthrift ways just irresponsible, or is debt hiding a form of cheating?

Is Debt Hiding a Form of Cheating?

What Constitutes Cheating

According to the dictionary, to cheat is defined as, “act dishonestly or unfairly in order to gain an advantage, especially in a game or an examination.”  With this definition, hiding debts or credit cards from your spouse is indeed cheating.

The Debt Is Almost Always Discovered

Depending how involved your spouse is in your finances, if you are secretly hiding debt, you may be able to hide it for a few months or years, but the deceit is almost always discovered.  If you or your spouse has your credit pulled for any reason, the secret debt will be there in black and white.

Serious Ramifications for Your Relationship

At its core, hiding debt is about lying to your spouse.  But not only are you lying, you’re putting your own and your spouse’s financial future in jeopardy.  Even if you’ve put all of the secret debt in your name only, if you and your spouse divorce, your spouse may also be on the hook for that money.  Even if you don’t divorce, paying down that debt takes money away from your financial goals.

Hiding Addictions?

If your spouse has racked up a significant debt without your knowledge, he may be hiding an even bigger secret.  Some spouses hide gambling or drug addictions that go hand in hand with hiding increasing debt.

Is Debt Hiding a Form of Cheating?
Photo by Aysha Begum on Unsplash

I knew someone in college whose mother discovered that her father had secretly racked up $30K in credit card debt.  She found out that much of that money was to support his alcohol habit.  However, deeper probing lead her to discover that he had had a several years’ long affair that had resulted in a child.  He paid his mistress ample child support every month, and to make up for that loss of money in his income, he’d resorted to secretly charging expenses.

Come Clean Now

If you have secret debt, the best thing to do is to come clean now.  Your spouse will likely appreciate you honestly confessing rather than being caught at a later date.  Plus, the sooner you confess, the sooner you can stop the financial damage.  In fact, one survey found that most spouses wouldn’t consider a divorce over secret debt unless the debt was $15,000 or more.

Final Thoughts

Even if you say “no” to the question, “Is debt hiding a form of cheating?”, it is a form of deception that can have serious repercussions on your marriage.  The best strategy is to confess now.  Then, you and your partner can make a financial plan together and minimize the damage from the secret debt.

MelissaB
MelissaB

Melissa is a writer and virtual assistant. She earned her Master’s from Southern Illinois University, and her Bachelor’s in English from the University of Michigan. When she’s not working, you can find her homeschooling her kids, reading a good book, or cooking. She resides in New York, where she loves the natural beauty of the area.

www.momsplans.com/

Filed Under: Married Money

4 Ways to Find Extra Money to Put on Debt

January 9, 2020 By MelissaB Leave a Comment

4 Ways to Find Extra Money to Put on Debt

If you’re in debt, the common advice to get out of debt as quickly as possible is to get a second job and/or sell stuff.  But for some people, getting a second job isn’t an option, and there’s only so much stuff around the house you can sell.  However, there are 4 small ways to find extra money to put on debt that aren’t labor intensive but can make an impact on your debt reduction.

4 Ways to Find Extra Money to Put on Debt

You may have more money than you realize that can be mobilized to pay down your debt:

Practice Doing Without a Bit of Money Each Week

For instance, the first four weeks that you do this, just take $1 out of your budget a week to go toward debt repayment.  That is only $4 for the first 4 weeks, which almost anyone can do.  The next four weeks, make it $2 a week, so now you have $8 for the next four weeks going on debt.  By the last four-week cycle of the year, you’re at $13 a week, or $52 extra to go on debt for those four weeks.  At the end of a full year, you will have put an additional $364 on your debt.

Save All of Your Change

4 Ways to Find Extra Money to Pay Down Debt
Photo by Josh Appel on Unsplash

If you make a habit of paying in cash, try to save the change that you receive rather than spending it.  I used to do this quite regularly, and we would have anywhere from $250 to $300 in change at the end of the year, all of which can be put on debt.

Have a No Spend Month

At least once a year, try to have a no spend month.  You can decide if you want the no spend month to be only for groceries, or also for entertainment.  Now, this doesn’t mean that you don’t spend at all but that you try to avoid any extraneous purchases.  You might “need” to spend $300 on groceries for the month so you stay stocked in produce, milk, bread, etc., but if you usually spend $600 a month on groceries, your no spend grocery month will have netted you $300 in extra money.  Some people also say no to eating out or other entertainment during the no spend month to increase their savings.

Roll Extra From Any Budget Category Onto Debt

Let’s say you budget for $700 a month for groceries, but one month, there were great deals at the grocery store, and you only spent $643.  You can take that extra $57 and roll it onto debt.  Likewise, if your internet bill is $75 a month, but you call up your provider and negotiate a deal and now only have to pay $56 a month for the next 12 months, roll the savings of $19 each month onto your debt.

If, at the end of the month, you sweep all of the extra from any budget category onto your debt, you’ll likely have anywhere from a few dollars to a few hundred dollars to put on your debt.

Windfall Money

Any time you have unexpected money come your way, put it toward your debt.  You just got $1,600 back on your tax return?  Put it on your debt.  You got back a surprise $48 from your former employer?  Put it on your debt.  You use Rakuten regularly and just got a Big Fat Check for $7.47?  Put it on your debt.  No amount is too small.

Final Thoughts

While the common advice to pay down debt faster is to get a side gig, if you can’t do that, know that there are many other ways, even on a tight budget, that you can accelerate your debt repayment process.

What other ways have you found to pay down debt more quickly without getting a second job?

Incidentally, if you’re reading this because you’re in debt, but looking to get out of it, consider surfing over to our debt free family, they have a nice set of debt reduction tools that you might find helpful, here.

MelissaB
MelissaB

Melissa is a writer and virtual assistant. She earned her Master’s from Southern Illinois University, and her Bachelor’s in English from the University of Michigan. When she’s not working, you can find her homeschooling her kids, reading a good book, or cooking. She resides in New York, where she loves the natural beauty of the area.

www.momsplans.com/

Filed Under: Debt Reduction Tagged With: debt, Debt Reduction

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