Beating Broke

Ways to Save When A Family Member Is in the Hospital

January 20, 2020 By MelissaB Leave a Comment

When you have a family member in the hospital, the last thing that you want to think about is money. Yet, money is often a pressing concern because if you eat in the hospital cafeteria, pay for parking at the hospital, and stay in a hotel if the hospital is far from home, you will quickly rack up an expensive tab. You may already be anxious about your hospitalized family member; there’s no need to also worry about finances. There are several ways to save when a family member is in the hospital.

Ways to Save When a Family Member Is in the Hospital

Bring Your Own Food

My mom was in the hospital for a few days after a knee replacement, and one of the best things I did was to bring my own food. I bought a $13 dollar thermos from Amazon and brought my lunch in the thermos every day. It was piping hot when I was ready to eat. I also brought something cold like a sandwich in a little portable cooler for dinner, so my meals were covered. This also meant that I could keep my mom company all day without leaving to go down to the hospital cafeteria.

If you don’t have a thermos or portable cooler, check with the nurses. Many hospitals have a refrigerator visitors can use, and nurses may be willing to heat up your food for you. However, if your family member will be in the hospital for more than a few days, I highly recommend buying a thermos and portable cooler.

Ways to Save When a Family Member Is in the Hospital — Photo by Perfect Snacks on Unsplash

Don’t forget to also bring snacks like granola bars, fig newtons, and other small, shelf-stable, filling snacks.

Discounted Parking

I was lucky in that the hospital my mom stayed at did not charge parking. However, many do. Again, check with the hospital because some hospitals offer discounted or free parking if you get your parking ticket validated.

Also, if family friends or other relatives ask how they can help, don’t be shy about asking for money to pay for parking. When my mom was in the hospital, one family member generously gave me money to cover all of my accrued expenses, knowing how quickly they add up.

Discounted Hotel Stays

If your family member is in a hospital far from home, your expenses will likely add up even more quickly. One way to make a significant difference in your expenses is to find a discounted place to stay. Many cities have Ronald McDonald Houses nearby. These facilities offer families with kids in the hospital free lodging and food.

In addition, some hospitals have Ronald McDonald rooms right in the hospital. In the room, you can heat up food, sleep, take a shower, do laundry or watch TV.

Finally, some hotels near hospitals offer a discounted “hospital rate” for people who have family members in the hospital. Ask the hospital if they partner with any hotels for this rate. Also, when calling around for a hotel to stay in, make sure to mention your situation. The hotel may give you a discount.

Final Thoughts

If you have a family member in the hospital, remember that there are many ways you can save on food, parking, and lodging. The last thing you want to do is worry about money, so use some of these strategies to save money while caring for a sick relative.

Do Your Financial Splurges Embarrass You?

January 16, 2020 By MelissaB Leave a Comment

Do your financial splurges embarrass you? If they do, you may have noticed that some indulgences are more socially acceptable than others. Many people don’t see anything negative about someone buying a lot of clothes on clearance even though her closet is already full and she doesn’t need anything. Get a steal on clothes that you don’t even need, and you’ll likely be praised. In fact, others may try to emulate your deal seeking prowess. Yet, spend your money on something that benefits you but society sees as extravagant, and you may be shamed.

Bargain Shoppers or Money Wasters?

I have a relative who is very good at frugal grocery shopping. However, she is a little too good at it. She buys more “deals” than she needs, so much so that she had her husband build shelves in their basement for her to store the deals that don’t fit in their pantry and kitchen. Because she goes shopping for groceries every week, continually finds deals, and only has three members in her family, she’ll never get through all of the food deals she has bought before they expire. Yet, friends always are impressed by her grocery shopping skills.

Do Your Financial Splurges Embarrass You? — Photo by chuttersnap on Unsplash

In our society, we see spending as little as possible per item as admirable even if we’re spending a lot over time for things we don’t need. In fact, in my relative’s case, these items may never be used and just tossed at a later date.

Splurges That Fit Your Life and Budget

However, if you hire a housekeeper because you have a busy schedule and a messy house stresses you out, people may judge you and argue that you’re spending your money frivolously. Yet, isn’t it just as frivolous to buy clothes and groceries that you don’t need?

The bottom line is that we all get to choose what to do with our money. If you’re financially responsible, you can choose to spend your money in ways that others may find frivolous.

Perhaps you hire a house cleaning service. Maybe you buy that sports car you’ve wanted since you were a teenager. Maybe you take the trip to Europe that you’ve always dreamed of.

Don’t feel the need to conform to society’s expectations and judgments.

If you and your spouse work full-time outside the home, and you’d benefit from more hours on the weekends spending time with your kids rather than cleaning the house, go ahead, spend your discretionary money on hiring a house cleaner.

If you feel that a traveling sports team will give your child an advantage when it comes to high school and college as well as personally and physically, go ahead and pay for the team and the travel if you need to travel with your child.

The bottom line is that you make the best decisions for you and your family. Maybe you have a minimalist wardrobe and cook at home every night so you can afford to splurge in other areas of your life. That’s okay.

You can spend your extra money any way you see fit. Society has a rigid standard of what compromises smart use of your money. However, only you and your spouse can determine what compromises smart use of your own money considering your lifestyle and finances.

What is one splurge that you have that you feel society frowns upon? How did you overcome societal judgement?

Is Debt Hiding a Form of Cheating?

January 13, 2020 By MelissaB Leave a Comment

When you think of infidelity, you likely think of one person sneaking out late at night or during the workday to have a romantic tryst with someone other than her spouse. But sexual infidelity is just one form of infidelity. Another type that is becoming increasingly common in our society is secretly spending money and going into debt without your spouse’s knowledge or consent. Yet, is hiding your spendthrift ways just irresponsible, or is debt hiding a form of cheating?

What Constitutes Cheating

According to the dictionary, to cheat is defined as, “act dishonestly or unfairly in order to gain an advantage, especially in a game or an examination.” With this definition, hiding debts or credit cards from your spouse is indeed cheating.

The Debt Is Almost Always Discovered

Depending how involved your spouse is in your finances, if you are secretly hiding debt, you may be able to hide it for a few months or years, but the deceit is almost always discovered. If you or your spouse has your credit pulled for any reason, the secret debt will be there in black and white.

Serious Ramifications for Your Relationship

At its core, hiding debt is about lying to your spouse. But not only are you lying, you’re putting your own and your spouse’s financial future in jeopardy. Even if you’ve put all of the secret debt in your name only, if you and your spouse divorce, your spouse may also be on the hook for that money. Even if you don’t divorce, paying down that debt takes money away from your financial goals.

Hiding Addictions?

If your spouse has racked up a significant debt without your knowledge, he may be hiding an even bigger secret. Some spouses hide gambling or drug addictions that go hand in hand with hiding increasing debt.

Is Debt Hiding a Form of Cheating? — Photo by Aysha Begum on Unsplash

I knew someone in college whose mother discovered that her father had secretly racked up $30K in credit card debt. She found out that much of that money was to support his alcohol habit. However, deeper probing lead her to discover that he had had a several years’ long affair that had resulted in a child. He paid his mistress ample child support every month, and to make up for that loss of money in his income, he’d resorted to secretly charging expenses.

Come Clean Now

If you have secret debt, the best thing to do is to come clean now. Your spouse will likely appreciate you honestly confessing rather than being caught at a later date. Plus, the sooner you confess, the sooner you can stop the financial damage. In fact, one survey found that most spouses wouldn’t consider a divorce over secret debt unless the debt was $15,000 or more.

Final Thoughts

Even if you say “no” to the question, “Is debt hiding a form of cheating?”, it is a form of deception that can have serious repercussions on your marriage. The best strategy is to confess now. Then, you and your partner can make a financial plan together and minimize the damage from the secret debt.