Beating Broke

Personal Finance from the Broke Perspective

Should You Only Get Your Teens Braces If They Want Them?

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Only Get Your Kids Braces If They Want Them

Do your kids have braces? If so, they join the nearly 70% of teenagers between the ages of 12 and 17 who have or have had braces (Kennell Orthodontics). Most orthodontic treatments cost between $3,000 and $7,000, representing a serious investment for parents. Unfortunately, many teens don’t appreciate this financial investment, which begs the question, should you only get your teens braces if they want them?

My Braces Story

When I was a teen, I didn’t need braces, but I did need a retainer. I found the retainer uncomfortable, and I had a lisp when I talked with it. I had to tell my teacher I was missing page 66 in a textbook, and with the retainer, what I sounded like was, “I’m mithin’ page thixty thix.” He couldn’t understand me and had to ask another student to translate.

I took the retainer out every day to eat lunch and wrapped it in a napkin. However, one day I accidentally threw it away. To this day, my mom thinks I did it on purpose, but I didn’t. She didn’t buy me a replacement retainer, and my brief stint in the orthodontics world was over.

My Children’s Braces Stories

I have three kids. The older two needed braces; the younger one did not.

Only Get Your Teen Braces If They Want Them

My son disliked his braces. When the treatment was over, he never wore his retainer. My husband and I spent over $3,500 for his orthodontic treatment. We feel that we wasted money because, without a retainer, his teeth continue to shift. I wouldn’t be surprised if someday they’re back where they were before we started treatment.

Our daughter doesn’t like braces, but she fastidiously maintains them. Even though she’s in treatment, I do not doubt that she will religiously wear her retainer and maintain her new smile.

Should You Only Get Your Teen Braces If They Want Them?

That’s a tough question because I feel that I wasted my money on one child but not the other. Ultimately, I would say the decision comes down to how much will the child be impacted in the future if he does not get braces?

If the child has overcrowding or an under or overbite that may cause damage to her teeth in adulthood, then you should get them braces. However, if the teeth are simply overlapping or have gaps in them, perhaps you could gauge whether or not you should get him braces based on his interest.

Final Thoughts

I’m not a doctor, so I am only giving my opinion as a parent with two kids who had braces and had vastly different behavior towards those braces. As a parent, I’m frustrated by paying thousands of dollars for a child who won’t maintain that dental work.  I’m sure my mom was just as frustrated by me.

Unfortunately, the optimal time for orthodontic work is during the teen years, when most kids aren’t particularly responsible. As for me, I sought orthodontic treatment in adulthood to fix my teeth, and I was much more responsible than I was as a teen, especially since I was the one paying for it.

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How to Deal with a Person Who Keeps on Asking for Money

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Most of us know a family member or friend who is always asking for money. They may start their request with a typical line, “I hate to ask, but I have a financial situation and wondered if you could help?” If they’ve asked you many times before, they may also add, “I promise, this will be the last time I ask.” Sound familiar? If you have experienced this, here’s how to deal with this type of person in your life.

Recognize Your Role in the Problem

If you have a person like this in your life, recognize that you’ve enabled this person to feel dependent on you. You do this by lending the person money over and over again even though the person repeatedly shows that she is financially irresponsible.

I don’t point this out to make you feel bad but rather to help you recognize your role in this cycle. However, you can take steps now to end the dependency and become part of the solution rather than the problem.

How to Deal with a Person Who Keeps on Asking for Money

The first step is to decide that you won’t allow the person to take advantage of you anymore. Instead, try one of these tactics.

Firmly Say No

The next time a friend or family member asks for money, firmly but nicely tell him that you can’t lend him money anymore. Be confident in your delivery. If you say, “I’m sorry, I just can’t lend you money right now,” or “This week my money is tight, so I can’t give you anything,” you leave open the prospect of giving him money in the future, and the person will ask again next week.

You must instead clearly say that you will no longer be able to help him out financially. Then, he has no choice but to receive and understand your message. He may ask you again at a later time, but perhaps he won’t be as persistent in his request.

As you continue to firmly say no to his every request, he will stop asking. However, don’t be surprised if he becomes angry with you and perhaps even stops speaking to you for a time.

Manage Her Finances

If you’re close to the person, perhaps offer to manage her finances and teach her good financial habits. My roommate in college, Jenny, was terrible with money and regularly asked her friends for handouts. One of our friends, Simone, was studying to be an accountant. She offered to manage Jenny’s finances. Jenny happily agreed.

For six months, Simone managed Jenny’s finances. She set up a budget for her and gave her money for spending, gas, groceries, etc. Simone paid the rest of Jenny’s bills with Jenny’s money. Once Jenny got used to the system and having a limit, Simone taught her to budget her money and pay her bills herself. By senior year, Jenny was a budgeting pro and even sometimes offered to pay the tab when she was out with friends.

Person Keeps Asking for Money
Photo by Jarritos Mexican Soda on Unsplash

For this arrangement to work, you must be close to the person, and you must both trust one another. In addition, the person has to want to improve their financial situation. If the person doesn’t have any interest in managing her money, you’ll just waste your time.

Offer Him a Financial Course

If you don’t want to manage his money (which is understandable), you could offer to pay for him to take a financial course. Financial Peace University is a Dave Ramsey course that has helped many people turn their financial lives around. However, it’s not the only course available. Find one that will best resonate with the person and that you can afford to pay for.

When you make this gesture, you’re not refusing the person outright. You’re refusing to enable the person, but you’re offering to pay for a class and invest in him and his education. This shows that you want to keep the relationship strong.

Why You Should Stop Lending Money

Saying no to someone who repeatedly asks for money can feel awkward and embarrassing. However, you should say no for several reasons.

You Work Hard and Should Keep Your Money

You likely work hard for your income. Giving a portion of that money to someone who mismanages her own money isn’t fair to you. If you choose to donate the money, that’s your decision. However, if you give this person money out of guilt or because you feel bad saying no, do yourself a favor and value yourself, your time, and your money more. You’ll feel better when you do.

Avoid Spousal Disputes

The number one cause of divorce is money disputes. If you continually give money to someone in your life, chances are your spouse is not happy about this. Your spouse will likely be much happier if you learn to say no to the person. Then, you can use your money for your own family—for vacations, retirement savings, college savings, etc.

Let the Person Become Independent

You may feel bad when you say no. You may wonder how she’ll survive without the money she needs for whatever pressing emergency she has now. She’ll probably be angry with you and lash out.

However, take the time to look in the future. Imagine how much happier and stronger this person will be in a year when she is no longer looking for handouts and knows how to manage her own money. She’ll be more confident and feel better about herself. By saying no, you’re helping her grow as a person.

Final Thoughts

Saying no when a person keeps on asking for money isn’t easy. However, remember that you’re doing the right thing for yourself, your spouse, and the person who keeps on asking. When you set clear boundaries, you strengthen your relationships. If the person doesn’t understand this, you may, unfortunately, lose the relationship. If she does understand and makes changes, she’ll thank you later.

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Reasons Why You Need a Will Even When You’re Broke

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Why the Broke Need a Will

You may think that only senior citizens need wills, but that’s not true.  People need wills as soon as they have assets they’ll leave behind or when they have a spouse or children.  Even the broke need a will if they are leaving dependents behind.

When You Don’t Need a Will

There’s one time in life when you don’t need a will—when you’re single, without children, and in debt without assets.  Because there are no assets to divide, you don’t need a will.  This would be likely if you’re in college or just out of college, living in an apartment, and have student loan or credit card debt.

Why You Need a Will Even When You’re Broke

There are several reasons why the broke need a will.

Designate Who Will Raise Your Children

If you have children, you can dictate through a will who you want to raise your children in the event that you and your spouse die at the same time (or if your spouse is deceased).  If you don’t have a will in place, the state will decide who will become your children’s legal guardian.  I’m sure you would rather choose than have the state decide.

Why the Broke Need a Will
Photo by Peter Idowu on Unsplash

You May Not Be as Broke as You Think

Another reason why you need a will is that you may think you’re broke, but you’re not.  Take the time to consider all of the assets that you do have.

Potential Assets

For instance, do you have a life insurance policy?  Even if you haven’t bought one yourself, often your employer supplies you with some life insurance.

Do you own a home?  If so, how much equity do you have in the home?

What about your belongings?  Do you own anything of value?

Do you have a retirement account?  Again, even if you haven’t set one up independently, do you have one through your employer?  If so, how much is the balance?

Most people, when they consider all of these sources, realize that they do indeed have assets.  A will helps you designate who will get those assets when you die.

If you have children, you’ll likely want the assets to go to those individuals you’ve asked to raise your children in the event of your death.

How to Create a Will

Now that you’ve decided you likely need a will, you probably think you don’t have enough money to pay for the creation of a will.  While hiring a lawyer can be expensive, you can create a will fairly cheaply by using a website service.

My husband and I created our will seven years ago using LegalZoom.com.  We answered questions, filled out the form, and then paid $250.  When we were done, lawyers looked over the document, and within a week we had our will.

Once you create a will, remember to update it as you have more children or accumulate more debts.

Final Thoughts

If you’re anything but single with no kids, then you need to create a will.  No one likes to think about dying, but we’re all going to do so one day.  It’s better to take the time now to designate who gets your assets and who will raise your children should you have an untimely death.

Remember, creating a will doesn’t have to be expensive, and your family will be glad you took the time to create one.

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