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Is a Side Hustle Worth the Family Sacrifice?

June 20, 2022 By MelissaB Leave a Comment

Side Hustle Worth the Family Sacrifice

When our kids were young, my husband and I struggled financially. My husband was getting his Ph.D. and worked as a graduate assistant. I had just quit my full-time job because the cost of daycare in Chicago for two kids under two plus after-school care for our oldest would cost me as much as I was taking home each week. We survived for three years like this until my husband graduated and started working a regular job and a side hustle. I also worked a part-time job from home. Now that we’re 10 years removed from that situation, we recently discussed if a side hustle is worth the family sacrifice.

Some Times You Have No Choice

I want to acknowledge that sometimes, you have no choice. Sometimes you have to work as much as you can to cover rent, buy groceries, and care for your family. For my husband and I, the first few years after he graduated were like this. We were in debt because we had lived off his graduate assistantship and student loans those last three years, and we needed side hustles to try to get out of the hole we were in. However, we should have set a limit for how long we would work our side hustles.

Dave Ramsey’s Influence

Fifteen years ago, I loved listening to Dave Ramsey, and I bought into the idea that we should “live like no one else so later we can live like no one else.” I accepted the sacrifice that side hustles required because I was sure that if we worked hard, we’d end up on the other side, able to check off the baby steps.

Is A Side Hustle Worth the Family Sacrifice?

We are now at the point where we’ve completed baby steps 1, 2, and are on baby step 3. However, we’re also at the point where our kids are now 18, 13.5, and 12. We lost a lot of our kids’ lives to side hustles.

Is a side hustle worth the family sacrifice? As a parent with older children, I can answer for us, it was not worth it.

What We Sacrificed for the Side Hustle

Side hustles have a dark side that most people don’t talk about. For us, these were the major drawbacks:

We Were Exhausted

Is a Side Hustle Worth the Family Sacrifice?

After my husband got home from his regular job and side hustle, I would start my work after being with the kids all day. I would often work until midnight and get up at 5 or 6 a.m. That was not enough sleep.

My husband and I were both exhausted all the time.

We Were Grouchy

Because we were working so hard and exhausted, we were also grouchy. Raising young children can be challenging under the best circumstances, but when you’re exhausted and grouchy, it’s not good for anyone.

Final Thoughts

Is a side hustle worth the family sacrifice? For us, the answer was no. Rather than following Dave Ramsey’s advice to hustle until you’re completely out of debt, we should have set a limited time frame for our side hustle. We hustled for far too long, and I’m sorry we missed out on some opportunities to spend enjoyable time with our kids when they were little because of that.

Read More

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4 Side Hustles for Teachers

MelissaB
MelissaB

Melissa is a writer and virtual assistant. She earned her Master’s from Southern Illinois University, and her Bachelor’s in English from the University of Michigan. When she’s not working, you can find her homeschooling her kids, reading a good book, or cooking. She resides in New York, where she loves the natural beauty of the area.

www.momsplans.com/

Filed Under: budget, Children, Debt Reduction, Emergency Fund, Frugality, General Finance, Guru Advice, Married Money, pf books, Saving Tagged With: family, getting out of debt, marriage, side hustle

Couples; To Combine Finances or Not?

April 29, 2011 By Shane Ede 12 Comments

Life
Married couples have been doing it for centuries.  Combining their finances is just something they’ve always done.  Call it tradition if you want.  Call it necessity.  Recently, it’s a tradition that has come under fire as being old and outdated.  After all, the reason that the tradition exists is because it was rather usual for the woman in the marriage to stay home and be a homemaker while the husband went off to work and earned the money.  Since the woman wasn’t contributing to the financial inflow, there was no reason for her to have her own account.  What would she put in it?

But, with a new age, comes new standards.  Now, it’s expected that a woman will enter the workforce (or, at least, the contingent workforce).  And she’ll remain there even after marriage.  Not only will she remain in the workforce, but there is a chance that she’ll bring more to the table financially than her husband.  Suddenly, the decision to combine finances isn’t such an easy one.  In fact, combining finances can lead to more arguments than keeping them separated, unless both parties are on the same page financially.  The way I see it, there are three ways you can handle finances as a couple.

Combined accounts. (What we do.)

We came to the conclusion early on in our marriage that combining finances made the most sense for us.  Neither of us made much more than the other, and we both brought about an equal amount of debt to the marriage.  We combined and pay all of our bills and other expenses from one account.  It makes it easier to balance, easier to pay, and avoids having to figure out how much each owes to what bill, or when/how to transfer money from one account to the bill pay account.

Combined account hybrid.

If you want the convenience of combined accounts, but still have a bit of an issue with purchasing things for each other.  Or, just want a “me” account where you can purchase whatever you want, whenever, no questions asked, a combined hybrid set up might make the most sense.  Combine all of your accounts, but open a new account in each of your names.  Those accounts get a set (budgeted) amount deposited into them each month.  Each account is completely hands off to the other partner.  Spend it however you like, as long as the cash is in the account to cover what you spend.

Completely separate.

You don’t like the idea of combined accounts at all.  They should be separate.  Each of you keeps your own account and you either agree on who is paying which bill, or you create a third account that each of you deposits your share of the bills into and pay all bills from that account.

Which is right for you? I can’t say which is right, or which is wrong for you.  It’s something that you need to sit down and discuss with your spouse/partner and decide on.  I think that combined finances are easier, but with automated deposits and bill pay, the separate accounts could be made pretty easy as well.  And, just because you settle on one way, doesn’t mean you can’t change it down the road.  What I will say is that people are sometimes quick to judge based on the decision that you make.  Are you too trusting by combining?  Not trusting enough by leaving things separate?  Perhaps your relationship is doomed if you don’t combine?

The truth of it is this: a majority of divorces have some root in money issues.  Forcing yourselves into a money model that you don’t like won’t help with that statistic.  Be open with each other about money.  Be willing to discuss your finances, both separately and combined, and get yourselves on a path to a solid financial future.  If you do that, it won’t matter which option you choose, it’ll be the right one.

photo credit: Will Folsom

Shane Ede

I started this blog to share what I know and what I was learning about personal finance. Along the way I’ve met and found many blogging friends. Please feel free to connect with me on the Beating Broke accounts: Twitter and Facebook.

You can also connect with me personally at Novelnaut, Thatedeguy, Shane Ede, and my personal Twitter.

www.beatingbroke.com

Filed Under: General Finance, Home, Married Money, ShareMe Tagged With: budget, budgeting, combined finances, couple money, marriage, married money, separate finances

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