Beating Broke

Personal Finance from the Broke Perspective

A Two-Step Approach to Preparing Kids for a Giving Holiday: Part One

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While you may not want to think about it yet, the holidays are right around the corner.  The commercial machine is cranking into gear.  My local Costco already has rows upon rows of Christmas presents for kids and Christmas trees and wrapping paper. . .Soon, there will be endless Christmas ads on television for all the latest toys and electronics your kids will beg for.

Each year, Christmas seems to become more and more about spending money and over consuming.  If you’ve come to dread the holiday season and the gimmes that come with it, now is the time to plan a different type of holiday.  Now is the time to plan a giving holiday.  Make a plan now, before the holiday is in full swing.

You can take a two part approach to this.  Part one is to allow your children to have an opportunity to give.  Part two is to reduce your child’s expectations for the gifts they will receive at Christmas.

Preparing Kids for a Giving HolidayToday, we’ll be talking about part one.

Strategies to Allow Your Children to Give at Christmas

While it’s nice to get things for Christmas, giving is also nice.  Well before Christmas starts, sit down with your kids (if they are old enough) and discuss how you’d like to give of your time.  If they’re still young, say under 5, you can just start a new tradition of giving of yourselves during the holidays.  You’ll experience very little resistance from the little ones.

Put in time.  One way to give, especially if you’re on a tight budget, is to give of your time.  You could volunteer to work in a soup kitchen or to help assemble thanksgiving meal baskets at your local church.  You could go through your closets and donate excess clothes or other items.

Give your money.  If you have more money than time, you can give your money to help make the holidays better for another family.  You could pick a name from a giving tree that pops up in December.  (The post office often has one as does Whole Foods and other grocery stores.)  Take your child with you to buy a present for the child in need.

Or, you could donate to a charitable organization like World Vision.  Look through the catalog and either choose to sponsor a child or to make a one-time contribution.  Let your child know how the money will be used and help him to realize how much more he has than the family of the child who will be receiving the money.

Another organization, Samaritan’s Purse, has a giving project, Operation Christmas Child.  You fill a shoebox with simple toys and school materials for a needy child.  This is a nice project to do with your children, and you can give without spending a lot of money, if your money is tight.

If you want to get away from the consumer driven holiday season, know that you CAN have a different kind of holiday this year.  However, you’ll need to start now and take the first step–teaching your children the importance of giving at the holidays.  Next time we’ll talk about the next step, adjusting expectations.

What’s your favorite way to teach your kids the importance of giving during the holidays?

Original photo credit: Theresa Thompson, on Flickr

What Christmas Expectations Are You Setting for Your Children?

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What are your children’s expectations for Christmas presents?  Do they expect many Christmas presents under the tree and their every wish to be met?  Do they expect a modest Christmas?

Believe it or not, the answer to this question doesn’t really depend on your kids; it depends on you.  From the time your children are small, you set their expectations, and what you set by example is what they come to know as “normal” (until they get married and find that their partner has a different “normal” than they do, but that is another post).

If you have small children, think carefully about what expectations you want to give your children.  Yes, retailers would prefer that you shop ’til you drop and give your credit card a work out, but it doesn’t have to be that way.  Here are what some people do who have chosen to have a different Christmas celebration than retailers would prefer you have:

1.  Give some new gifts, some used, and some homemade.

Amy Dacyczyn, the original Frugal Zealot and author of The Tightwad Gazette had six children to buy for.  Each child got one new gift.  Then, they got a few gifts that were used items that she had purchased at garage sales and thrift stores.  She also made her children a few gifts.  If I remember correctly, she spent $50 or under for each child.  (Of course, this was 20 years ago, so accounting for inflation, she spent no more than $82 for each child in 2012 dollars.

While you might balk at the idea of giving garage sale gifts for presents, I can tell you that I followed Dacyczyn’s practices when I had my own kids, and some of our kids’ presents are nice finds that we got at garage sales.  My oldest is 8, and he has yet to complain about it because it is what he expects.  He still does get new presents, but there are used ones in the mix.  (I like the term recycled better, though.)

2.  Give a charitable donation instead of gifts.

Ann Voskamp, the blogger behind A Holy Experience, recounts that one Christmas Eve 10 years ago, her son asked her, “Why don’t we give up things so we can give to Jesus for his birthday?”  The question radically changed Voskamp’s way of thinking, and from that year on, her family has foregone giving Christmas gifts to one another.  Instead, each day during Advent they make a charitable donation using the money they would have spent on gifts.

This is a radical idea, to be sure, but it is the norm now for her family.

3.  Only give 3 gifts.

Another idea based in Christian roots is to only give your children three gifts.  Some do this because the Wise Men brought Jesus 3 gifts.  Others take a spin on this and give their children three gifts–something they want, something they need, and something they can experience.

4.  Meet needs as gifts.

Gifts don’t have to be all luxuries and things you want.  When I was growing up, my parents’ money was extremely tight.  I got some new clothes during the back to school season, but my winter clothes and sometimes even my uniform clothing or new backpack were all given as Christmas presents.  I was always excited to get these things and never felt deprived.  My mom told me a few years ago that she had to give gifts this way because money was so tight, but I never knew.  This practice was normal for me.

Christmas gift giving was not always the extravaganza it is now.  As an adult, I reread the Little House in the Prairie books, and I was struck by how happy Laura was to get her very own handmade tin cup and an orange for Christmas one year.

If you are a parent of small children, you can start your Christmas gift giving traditions now, and they don’t have to involve credit card debt you can’t pay off until March or April.

What is your favorite way to give gifts at Christmas?

img credit: South Granville Live on Flickr

Ways to Save When Back-to-School Shopping

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After the long days of summer, many parents look forward to their children’s return to school.  Unfortunately, preparing for the return to school often includes a large financial outlay for back to school supplies and clothes.  However, there are several strategies you can employ to limit how much you have to spend.

Back to School Supplies

-In late July, try to obtain your child’s back to school supply list from the school.  Scour the ads for great deals and look at sites like A Full Cup to learn which items you can get for free.  It may take several weeks for all of the items on your child’s list to go on sale, which is why you want to start shopping in late July.  I employed this strategy last year and got all of my son’s school supplies for $12, and I bought extra to give at Christmas too.

glue army-Keep in mind that stores such as Staples, Office Depot and Office Max have a price matching policy.   If you find a lower price at a competitor’s store, bring in the ad, and the store you are shopping at will match the price.  You can save gas by taking advantage of this policy, but beware that most have a 7 to 14 day window for the competitor’s price, and a few stores exclude prices advertised on websites.

-When you can obtain items for free, try to buy more than you need.  Then, if your child runs out of some of the supplies mid-school year, you won’t have to pay full price to buy more.  You can just shop in your supply you got for free.

Back to School Clothing

-Before going out to shop for clothes, first go through your child’s closet to see what clothing they already have that still fits and is in good condition.  Make a list of items and colors so you can look for matching pieces when shopping.

-Check out stores like Once Upon a Child.  They often have new designer clothes for 1/3 to ½ the retail cost.

-Buy on eBay.  Many people list their children’s gently worn clothes on eBay, and you can find many auctions in late July and August.  To make sure you get a good deal, read the description thoroughly.  A good seller should specify how worn the clothes are and any flaws in the clothing.  To make sure you are dealing with a good seller, check their feedback.  It should be 100% positive.  I never buy from a seller with lower than 98% positive feedback.  Also, the more feedback a seller has, the more experienced they are.  Finally, feel free to ask questions about the clothing before you bid on it.  Consider buying several auctions from one seller who combines shipping to save on shipping costs.

-Check out Craigslist.  People often list their children’s clothes for sale and when they are having garage sales.  You probably don’t want to buy all of your children’s clothes used, but you can find some high quality clothing at a fraction of the cost by considering used clothing markets.

-Buy mix and match clothing.  Try to buy 3 to 4 pairs of pants and 5 to 6 shirts that can be interchanged.  This dramatically extends the variety of outfits your child can wear.

-Stagger your buying.  Buy some lightweight fall clothes early in the season, and buy sweaters and warmer clothes later in the fall.  This can help you distribute the money that you spend over a few months.  Wait for seasonal sales such as Columbus Day.  Also, the stores frequently reduce the fall merchandise to make way for the winter items; try to buy more clothes when they are on clearance.

The average American spends $600 on back to school shopping.  You can reduce that amount by half or more by following some of these strategies.  If you take the time to plan ahead and wait for the sales, you can dramatically cut your back-to-school expenses.  Happy frugal shopping!

photo credit: me and the sysop